Loki Criticized for Breeding Fenrir Instead of Adopting

Detractors call trickster god's actions, "unethical and gross"

MIDGAR — Norse god of mischief Loki faced widespread disapproval after it was discovered that he did not rescue his pet wolf Fenrir, but rather sired him upon the jötunn Angrboda.

“I know he’s a trickster god, but this is still disappointing,” said Svenn Magnussen, professor of Norse mythology and animal welfare advocate. “There are just so many monstrous canines wasting away in shelters across the country. Loki might not be the nicest guy, but he could have still provided a good home for one of those pups instead of seeking out some kind of designer abomination, which will probably have horrible health problems from being so inbred. It’s like he values the animal’s divine pedigree over its actual wellbeing.”

Loki defended his actions, saying he did nothing wrong.

“My choice of pet is no one’s business but my own,” said Loki. “I’m not just looking for a companion or a guard dog, here. I want this dog to set the world on fire during Ragnarök. You can’t set just any mutt to that task. There are very high breeding standards for that sort of thing. Besides, no one goes after Odin for his pet ravens. He doesn’t even have an exotic pet license.”

At press time, thoroughbred breeders were petitioning to have Loki removed from their registry after he gave birth to an eight-legged horse.